how to get the job of your dreams

It's a feat few people ever accomplish. Here are some suggestions from those who have -- a designer, a professional video gamer, a stand-up comedian, a musical producer/performer, and an adventure columnist. The average American works about 34 hours a week -- not an insignificant portion of one's life. It's no wonder then that many of us have embarked on what can often seem an unending quest to find a job that makes us truly happy.

"There's heaps of research out there that shows that the quality of your work affects your well-being and mental health. This has spillover effects for your life outside of work," says Professor Sharon Parker, Director of the Institute of Work Psychology at the University of Sheffield. She emphasizes that money is not usually the sole motivating factor behind why people choose to stay in a particular job; more important is whether it's challenging, exciting and stimulating.

As the work force expands and expectations spiral, the quest to find a job one is passionate about is gaining increasing significance. To help you in your search, we decided to talk to some people who've managed to land the job of their dreams and see if they have any advice. One thing they agree on: you've got to think big.
Pam Greene - Senior Design Innovator, Nike Considered

What she does: A nineteen-year Nike veteran, Greene's involvement in the company's relatively new Considered Group goes back to November of last year. Greene's work consists primarily of developing sustainable innovations to help Nike reduce its environmental footprint.

Why she loves it: "It's a true synthesis of a biology background with an innovation and design background." Further, Nike's ethos of educating designers by sending them all around the world offers Greene the ability to travel and to keep expanding her knowledge base. Last winter she spent seven weeks in Tokyo, absorbing the marketplace and the aesthetics there. She has also been sent to the beaches of Brazil to study sand sports.

Her career path: With a strong educational background in botany, Greene's transition into Nike was practically a straight shot. Her first job was at Stanford University's department of plant ecology, where she studied ecosystems in the California foothills, a position she enjoyed but wasn't completely satisfied with because it lacked the creativity she craved. She got her interview with Nike through a friend.

Her advice: Greene suggests that students, particularly potential designers, take as broad a range of classes as possible. "An indirect path to where you eventually want to arrive may be better than taking a direct route. As a designer, it's beneficial to make oneself as eclectic and interdisciplinary as possible… Because while you're studying algae or even sheep diseases, you never know what information you might get and how that might end up influencing your design work someday."
Fatal1ty (Johnathan Wendel) - Professional Video Gamer

What he does: A professional video gamer and 12-time world champion, Fatal1ty is also the exclusive commentator for the Championship Gaming Series and the global spokesperson for the league. When prepping for a tournament, he trains for hours a day and watches videos of himself in action. On a typical day he hangs with gamers, trains and practices with them, and goes to the TV studio where he interviews them. As a commentator, he talks about gaming strategy, trying to educate people on TV. At 26, Fatal1ty has had his own company for 5 years, making keyboards, headphones, mouse pads and other products for gamers.

Why he loves it: As he says, Fatal1ty can "never get enough" of what he does. While the pro-gamer admits that it is hard being on the road so much, away from his family and friends, the upside is that he has a friend in every port, and knows people across Europe, Asia, and the United States.

His career path: Fatal1ty started playing games when he was 4 or 5 years old. The first game he played was Ikari Warriors. He also played Mario Brothers and Flight Simulators. He professes an early interest in competitive sports -- "that's what got me to where I am today. There's definitely a connection between athletics and gaming; every skill one needs in a traditional sport is the same thing in the games I play: reflexes, timing, strategies, hand-eye coordination."

After playing a few tournaments in his hometown and later around the country, Fatal1ty participated in his first professional tournament when he was 18, bagging third place among players from around the world. He then got invited to Sweden to represent the U.S., and at the age of 18 he became world champion.

His advice: Fatal1ty recommends that potential gamers immerse themselves in the industry: play online tournaments, watch demos, and go to LAN parties to network. People also need to be prepared for hard work. "People who think they should just get things for who they are, are the people who don’t make it… You have to have that extra drive and effort to follow your passion."

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Your life & relaxed step

We are free and strong in spirit. Not averse to participate in racing, ready to lead a team of builders (and some of their own friends with a drill) and are investigated in elite varieties of alcohol. But in sex, we, as before, rarely take the initiative.

DASHA - THIS IS A DREAM
Why? Let's start with the most obvious: Dasha chest and legs. That is, CHEST LEGS (!!!) and (!!!). Next - the details. Dasha makes, like me, only three times as much. She travels a lot. She drives a big blue car so relaxed and confident that I want to write a laudatory ode to the girls behind the wheel. If my blanket in the hospital bandaged not a pink bow, and blue, I'd first got to Dasha in the queue. That is the first. Actually, all those who dressed as a baby-blue ribbons still nourish Dasha undying interest. But Dasha is Alex. She called me, when Alex came out to smoke, and quickly whispered: "Listen, I can not! And today, I'll do it! We know more than a decade. He saw me with a pimple on his nose and Daria Dontsova in his hands. I have nothing to fear! But I still can not itself offer him sex. We have just seen this movie! Under such a lamb with wine! And so it went, and I ... wait, that he ... "The monologue was cut short on the most interesting place, but to cope with indignation I could not. Why Dasha, whose legs, chest, machine intelligence, humor and everything else that fits over so well to me, but the fates decreed got it, why is it silent? I would be in her place ... What appeared a great excuse to seek public opinion. The results were surprising. It turns out Dasha is no exception. Rather, the exception - it's me. Because I - it's Dasha vice versa. Ashad. I have never hesitated to take the initiative. In life - in general, and sex - in particular. I took the initiative as an indirect (hints, provocation, talking around and around), and plain text. There have been a lucky shot, were in "milk". Some calls back, the other - no, the third I was not going to give myself a second chance ... Once I got into the top ten: the first offered his then-not-yet-husband (week of correspondence on a dating site, plus three visits) for the move to the next stage of candy and bouquets of . Not-yet-husband was brave: not rolled head over heels down the stairs, not broken glasses. Still, excitement, gave decidedly: "I ... you know ... It's not time." And retreated into the night. True, the sex will still happen. A day later. Since we're together. Five years. But it's not about me but about Dasha. And on at once joined the Dasha of my girlfriends, who confirmed that all it is. If we bring the sex menu, we have it with curiosity and pleasure are studying. And if you do not bring, in nine cases out of ten we will not occur to him to ask.


WHAT WE afraid
I collected the most common fears that commented Dmitry Zapolsky, PhD, sex therapist and consultant, an expert on female sexuality and techniques to achieve female orgasm. So we feel free to suggest sex ...

... A man who had not consented to be bound
"No way, not come to a colleague, friend, the guy from the club. But sometimes these men themselves take the initiative, so some extra. "
? (Marina, 27)
"Perhaps the Marina does not consider himself worthy of happiness, and therefore afraid to say directly about their desires. Maybe she subconsciously finds sex dirty and if the initiative comes not from her, she is clean. This is called "delegation of responsibility."

"I'm embarrassed to be bold, yet remained a virgin. But after the first time do not hesitate at all "?
(Natasha, 25)
"Natasha has achieved harmony with herself, she - equal partners in relationships with men. This may scare off a man who himself used to be a leader, but the world is that man can not always separate the erotic message, addressed personally to him from the sexual background of the TV, from the pages of magazines, from an unknown woman on the street. And the sacramental "Honey, why do not we drink wine at my house?" - Did not seize the initiative, but simply a sensible signal, which is sure to be heard. "

... Its a young man
"I know that he should understand me. But embarrassed, though, and realize: I certainly deprive not only yourself but it "?
(Masha, 21)
"It probably is. So, it is necessary to deal with shyness - "for himself and for the guy." Perhaps the only partner it and waits. "

... Their future young man
"I refrained from making direct offers to the man with whom we have just evolved a romantic relationship. I knew it was a big risk for the senses, which wanted to keep. "?
(Olya, 29)
"Psychologists call these things a projection. Most likely, Olga projected, suffered by this man their complexes. There is a notion of "intimofobiya" - fear of intimacy. Often it is based on another layer of fear - fear of being inconsistent in my bed and the fear of losing their "protection." Olya as it is written on his forehead: "I'm not so ... not dissolved."

... Husband
"Secretly, I fear give birth to role-play in bed, but to give her husband something like," Come on, I'll call you Darth Vader, and you did rebel prisoner, "I can not. I'm sure - he will support me. But it is not ready - and everything. "
? (Anya 26)
"Try to be more daring: a matrimonial bedroom, there are no restrictions, if the experiments do not harm health. An understanding of this comes with age and experience. But if the constraint takes precedence over the desires, there is a great way - not to speak, and write notes to each other. And put them in the hollow of an old oak tree in the park ... well, at least under the pillow! The main thing that the "prose" of family life, no, no yes and was sparkling rhyme novelty.

WHAT THEY THINK?
They - are men. Their opinions range from "I am delighted, if a woman initiates sex" to "Z for modesty." I think the past is not entirely sincere - may want to look more brutal than it is, or have not yet met a woman who turned their presentation. And I do not know what to do you tonight. But if you first take his hand, teasing beautiful neck, "accidentally" prikornesh on his knees, sigh, you're alone and nobody understood, then the proposed instead to feed your fish (cook gazpacho, listen to jazz, to meet the dawn), I I will consider my mission accomplished. No, no one knows the outcome. Nevertheless, I am absolutely sure that it is better to do and regret than not to do and regret. I, who once suggested to his not-yet-husband away with candy and bouquets in favor of more urgent. "In my medical experience I have never encountered a situation where she would offer her man sex, but he began to treat her worse, - says Dmitry Zapolsky. - Although admitting that such men are in the world. But, obviously, they and their friends to sexologists are not traded. And how to solve their problems of an intimate nature, and decide whether - the science is unknown. "

AND AGAIN about Dasha
Dasha is still made. And then again. And more. When I finished writing an article she sent me a letter: "I finally got it, I hesitated, historically, fearing that he or fails, or" descend "to me. Everything was from my complexes and of those men who these complexes once cultivated in me. Alex long to cure my fear of his tenderness and care. So, your desires, I hid all this time ... by inertia! All the inertia of the past, now all in the past. Loesche and love it. His is exciting. Our life was happy and fulfilling. And in the bedroom. And out of it. "?

Experienced women
"After my 25 years I suddenly realized: what we girls worse than men? Why they can, but we can not? And from the stiffness was gone. "
? (Alia, 29)
"I realized the root problem - a lack of love for yourself. So I decided to love myself. And in the mood for that person who is ready to accept new ideas, I can open. I myself like me brave. "?
(Svetlana, 23)
"I noticed that shyness is manifested with the" unnatural "person. Sexuality "chlopyvaetsya" all annoying. Well, with such a partner initiative and is not needed, as well as himself sex. As soon as I can see that people "own", the barriers are crumbling themselves. " ?
(Alina, 30)
"I ceased to be troubled with age, and immediately realized how much I missed! I'm not one of those people who catches the train has left - and right. But life would have turned out differently if I had been braver. "
? (Nina, 36)
"I no longer hesitate when I suddenly realized that men are afraid to even more!"?
(Julia, 24)

ON ITEMS
MARIA Rasbash, coach
Center for Positive Psychology
Alexander Sviyash:

"Rejecting the initiative, you are depriving yourself of pleasure. Why do we shy away from sex to provoke? There can be several.
Internal installation at the genetic level sex taboo topic as it was for many centuries.
HOW TO WORK WITH IT: breaking installation consciously! Gradually learn to signal its desire to partner - and you will see that this is not a shame and even sexy - deliberately violating a taboo, you'll want to play it again and again.
Doubts about the appeal you are not confident, but you have plenty of painful experiences (betrayal, a feeling of rejection), and it can not take the initiative in sex.
HOW TO WORK WITH THIS: let the past get rid of his negative assessment, begin to treat it as a set of facts that have occurred, but were left behind. Here can help psychotherapy. Along the way, find out what it strengthens your self-esteem. Shopping? Sport? Massage? Now go and entertain that.
"Not the kind of situation," Sometimes in order to initiate sex and get it, you need a special atmosphere (romantic evening picnic, lack of friends and liabilities), and sometimes to "turn a horse" is not enough trust and understanding.
HOW TO WORK WITH THIS: create the situation itself. Hint that you desire to attend the concert, the famous saxophonist, prepare dinner with aphrodisiacs, buy new clothes ... and do not be silent! Sometimes, to overcome the barrier and show a sense of enough public discussion.
Fear of fear of condemnation, openness of their sexual fantasies.
HOW TO WORK WITH IT: A joint campaign in a sex shop, read articles or books, watching movies - you can use any new experiences that will help you get on the right path and find out in advance the ratio of partners to experiment

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Job Jugglers, on the Tightrope

Mr. Fierro, who is 26, has four jobs: working as a bilingual-curriculum specialist for the textbook publisher Pearson; handling estate sales and online marketing for a store that sells vintage items; setting up an online store for a custom piñata maker; and developing reality-show ideas for a production company. So far this month, he's made about $1,800.
Whereas most 9-to-5ers have some kind of structure in their lives, each workday can be wildly different for him. On a recent day, he worked on and off from 7 a.m. to midnight, making business calls, working on the piñata store's Web site and visiting the vintage store, among other things. (To maintain his sanity, he made sure to schedule some "me" time from 2 to 4 and 6 to 8.)
"I have eight million things going on," said Mr. Fierro, who lives in the West Town area of Chicago. "It's exhausting. Sometimes I just want to take a nap."
Some portions of the population -- especially young, creative types like actors, artists and musicians -- have always held multiple jobs to pay the bills. But people from all kinds of fields are now drawing income from several streams. Mr. Fierro, for one, has a degree in international studies and Latin American studies at the University of Chicago.

Some of these workers are patching together jobs out of choice. They may find full-time office work unfulfilling and are testing to see whether they can be their own boss. Certainly, the Internet has made working from home and trying out new businesses easier than ever.
But in many cases, necessity is driving the trend. "Young college graduates working multiple jobs is a natural consequence of a bad labor market and having, on average, $20,000 worth of student loans to pay off," said Carl E. Van Horn, director of the John J. Heldrich Center for Workforce Development at Rutgers.
"There are two types of people in this position: the graduate who can't get a full-time job, and the person whose income isn't sufficient to meet their expenses," he said. "The only cure for young people in this position is an economic recovery of robust proportions."
An entry-level salary often doesn't go very far these days. According to a study by the Heldrich Center, the median starting salary for those who graduated from four-year degree programs in 2009 and 2010 was $27,000, down from $30,000 for those who graduated in 2006 to 2008, before the recession. (Try living on $27,000 a year -- before taxes -- in a city like New York, Washington or Chicago.)
Many earn even less than $27,000. Maureen McCarty, 23, who graduated from American University in 2010 with a journalism degree, makes $25,000 before taxes as managing editor of TheNewGay.net, a blog focusing on gay issues, with no benefits like health insurance or a 401(k). The salary doesn't cover her expenses, so she often baby-sits five nights a week for six families in the Washington area.
Without the baby-sitting jobs, she says, she couldn't afford to live in Adams Morgan, a hip neighborhood in Washington, or take a vacation: "I'm working in online publishing, an industry that is struggling to monetize, so if I want to do anything fun, like take a trip to New Orleans, I have to have additional income."
Juggling jobs has its perils. "I do sometimes get my schedules mixed up and will double- or even triple-book myself," Ms. McCarty said. Maintaining a social life can be challenging, and it might consist of "dragging a friend along while I run errands on a Saturday."
"Sometimes I do get burnt out from all of the juggling, but caffeine, for the most part, keeps me going," she said. "I try when I get to that point to take some time by myself even if it's just 30 minutes during lunch."
All told, Ms. McCarty says, she works 75 to 80 hours a week, a schedule more typical of investment bankers or lawyers aspiring to make partner in a firm -- but for just a fraction of the pay.
Between her salary at TheNewGay.net and the $5,000 she makes at her various baby-sitting jobs, Ms. McCarty has a pre-tax income of $30,000, or about $2,500 a month. More than $700 a month goes to the apartment she shares with two roommates.
Some months, however, when she doesn't have enough baby-sitting jobs lined up, Ms. McCarty has to make that "horrible phone call" to her parents to tell them that she can't make her rent.
LOUISE GASSMAN, 28, has a rotating schedule of multiple jobs: as an actress; as an assistant to dance instructors at the Circle in the Square and Juilliard schools; as a baby-sitter; and in a variety of administrative roles and as a spinning instructor at SoulCycle, an indoor cycling studio in New York.
Ms. Gassman's monthly income, which can vary greatly depending on whether she books an acting job, ranges from $1,800 to $4,000. Some months, almost all of her income goes to the $1,450 rent on her 290-square-foot studio on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. Whatever is left after essentials goes toward paying off her remaining $16,000 in college loans.
"I worry about money all the time," Ms. Gassman said. "I live on a really tight budget, and I live paycheck to paycheck."
Periodically, the accountant who cuts her check at SoulCycle reminds her that someone her age should be putting away $300 a paycheck for retirement, an amount that is sometimes almost half of her pay. "I'm like, retirement?" she asks. "Then I have the 'Oh my God, Oh my God' feelings."
Ms. Gassman has come up with creative ways to save money. She has a policy not to spend $5 bills and instead puts them in a Tupperware container. So far, she's been able to use this cash to pay for a new air-conditioner, for three plane tickets, and for her dog to be neutered.
Mia Branco, 23, says she is always worried about money, even though she also works four jobs. She is the house manager at the Discovery Theater at the Smithsonian Institute in Washington, teaches drama and music at Imagination Stage in Bethesda, Md., supervises the box office at the Woolly Mammoth Theater Company and works as a nanny.
Ms. Branco says she logs 40 to 50 hours a week, including travel time, and takes home $1,300 in a good month.
Still, Ms. Branco, who graduated magna cum laude with a degree in musical theater from American University in 2009, says she feels lucky to be employed at all. "The majority of the jobs I have right now are because people were laid off and they didn't want to hire back full-time employees," she said. "My willingness to have a hodgepodge schedule makes me more marketable."
But very few part-time employers offer health insurance, and job jugglers tend to worry: What happens if I become really sick or get into an accident?
At least Ms. McCarty is covered through her parents under the new health care law that allows anyone under 26 to stay on their parents' insurance.
Mr. Fierro still receives insurance from a teaching job he used to have, but it runs out in August. He doesn't know what he'll do after that.
Ms. Branco pays $89 a month for very basic health insurance that has a high deductible, the kind of plan that she says makes her "bank on not getting sick."
Ms. Gassman, who does not have health insurance and hasn't had a physical since 2004, says she is extra careful when crossing the street because anything medically catastrophic is simply not an option right now. "I can't afford to get hit by a taxi," she said.
ON the brighter side, when or if these job jugglers get on a career path, they may offer an attractive skill set: they are expert multitaskers, hyper-organized and often very knowledgeable in technology. Having multiple jobs is an exercise in mental dexterity.
Ms. Branco says that because of her four jobs, which require skills as diverse as developing lesson plans and mastering an online ticketing system, she has become more adept at dealing with a wide range of people and situations: "I've learned to be very adaptable, because one day I'm corporate, the next day I'm start-up, and the next day I'm nonprofit."
Mr. Fierro describes himself as "MacGyver." He might have to transport some furniture, "read and synthesize documents, find obscure bits of information on Google and give presentations in Spanish, all in one day," he says.
But beware: Too much multitasking makes it harder to sustain attention, according to Kirk Snyder, an assistant professor of communications at the Marshall School of Business at the University of Southern California, who researches the changing workplace values of Gen Y.
"I think being focused on more than one professional pursuit at the same time makes it easier to give up on those pursuits that take more effort or have a longer payoff curve because there are always other options to focus on," he said.
More damaging, however, may be the economics. A national study by the Johns Hopkins Institute for Policy Studies found that young women who worked primarily in part-time jobs did not make higher wages in their 30s than in their 20s.
"The study was clear. Women don't benefit wage-wise from working part time," said Andrew Sum, director of the Center for Labor Market Studies at Northeastern University and a co-author of the study. The reason is that part-time jobs generally provide fewer training opportunities and often don't put workers on a track for advancement.
More college graduates are working in second jobs that don't require college degrees, part of a phenomenon called "mal-employment." In short, many baby-sitters, sales clerks, telemarketers and bartenders are overqualified for their jobs.
Last year, 1.9 million college graduates were mal-employed and had multiple jobs, up 17 percent from 2007, according to federal data. Almost half of all college graduates have a job that doesn't require a bachelor's degree.
The goal for most, Mr. Sum said, is to be upgraded to full-time jobs. "That is where there is the most payoff for a college degree," he said.
But full-time jobs don't suit everyone. Ms. Gassman, for example, has been offered a full-time job at SoulCycle, complete with full benefits, but she doesn't want it. "I wouldn't be able to go on auditions in the middle of the day," she explained. "Of course, it stresses me out not to have health insurance, but what is my choice? Work in an office and be unhappy? Being happy is a superhigh value to me."
Mr. Fierro is much happier now than when he was working as a bilingual reading specialist for a public school in Chicago. "I was working 12 hours a day and making $38,000 a year and it wasn't making a dent in the $120,000 in loans I had to pay off. Plus, I was miserable."
Mr. Fierro, who calls himself an "aesthetic consultant," would ultimately like to create his own line of merchandise, along the lines of Marc Jacobs. He is optimistic that he is more likely to achieve his goal by working on many projects than if he held a traditional job.
Ms. Branco says that while she is often exhausted and hasn't had two consecutive days off in months, she isn't ready to commit to one employer. "The jobs are allowing me to wander and figure out what I really want to do," she said.
Professor Snyder at Southern Cal doesn't see multiple job-holding as a trend that will disappear anytime soon.
"The likelihood of this generation devoting their professional life to just one job or career at the same time is simply counterintuitive to their worldview," he said. "I think we would be seeing this generation pursuing multiple jobs and careers at once even in a robust economy."
Still, is job-juggling really sustainable, particularly when the next stage of life hits and there may be a mortgage and children?
Ms. McCarty doesn't think so. She is looking for an end to her 80-hour weeks and meager paychecks. "I don't want to be 30 and working a bunch of small jobs so I can pay my bills," she said.

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Food allergies in kids rising food allergies affect

A new study has found that food allergies in kids are rising. The study found that 30 percent of children who suffered from a food allergy  also suffered from multiple allergies. Researchers also discovered that Asian and African-American children were more likely to be affected.  One in 12 kids in the United States may have a food allergy, according to new findings based on an online survey.
The study, published June 20th in Pediatrics, also showed that more than one third of those kids had severe allergies, and that allergies were more common in minority kids.
Allergies are a particularly difficult chronic condition because kids can't escape food in any part of their daily lives, said lead author Dr. Ruchi Gupta, from the Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine in Chicago.
"What I hope this paper will do is open this awareness to how common (food allergy) is and how severe it can be, and develop policies for schools and sporting events and any activities that kids participate in to make it clear that everybody is looking out for these kids," she told Reuters Health.
Previous studies have estimated that anywhere between 2 and 8 of every 100 kids in the U.S. has a food allergy.
But most of those reports are based on studies that asked participants many different health questions, including only a few related to allergies, Gupta said. Other studies have also looked at emergency room trips for allergic reactions, or evaluated doctors' diagnoses in medical records.
Gupta and her colleagues instead wanted to design a study focused solely on the rate and severity of food allergies. They surveyed a nationally representative sample of almost 40,000 U.S. adults who lived with a child under 18.
Those adults filled out an online questionnaire about allergies based on a single kid in their household, reporting whether or not the child had any signs and symptoms of a food allergy, had ever been diagnosed with an allergy by a doctor, and had ever had a severe allergic reaction to food.
The results, published today in Pediatrics, showed that 8 percent of kids had a diagnosed food allergy or convincing symptoms that indicated an allergy - almost 6 million U.S. kids, the researchers said. Kids were most commonly allergic to peanuts, milk, and shellfish.
What was interesting was not just how many kids had allergies, Gupta said, but how many of those allergies were severe - cutting off a kid's airway or causing blood pressure to drop.
"One of our big findings was that 2 in 5 kids who had allergies had a severe reaction or a life-threatening reaction," Gupta said.
"There are a lot of misconceptions of what allergies are," she added. "When you think of allergies, you don't think of life-threatening."
Severe reactions were more common in older kids, possibly because young kids with allergies are more likely to be monitored by parents to make sure they stay away from potential allergy triggers, Gupta explained.
She and her colleagues also found that black and Asian kids had higher chances of having a food allergy than white kids - but that they were less likely to have that allergy diagnosed by a doctor.
That disparity "needs to be addressed," Dr. Scott Sicherer, an allergy researcher at the Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York, told Reuters Health.
"The family is saying that their child had convincing reactions and yet they weren't really evaluated to confirm that with a doctor," said Sicherer, who was not involved in the study.
"Is that because they're not getting the health care they need? Is that because there's not an appropriate amount of concern? I would be worried that the next reaction could be severe and they're not prepared for it."
While the findings can't show whether or not food allergies are on the rise, Gupta thinks that's the case.
"As a clinician, I see it a lot more," Gupta said. Sicherer agreed that he thinks food allergies are becoming more frequent, but said that researchers aren't sure why that is.
The next question, Gupta said, is whether there is something going on in the environment that is driving that increase.

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First Person Our $50 Wedding Anniversary

First Person Our $50 Wedding Anniversary

You'll see buildings with no 13th floor or house numbers that skip from 12 to 14, but when it's your 13th wedding anniversary, it's up to you to tame the unlucky number. With a budget of $50, things didn't look bright at the outset. But with careful planning, help from family and friends and our mutual promise to create meaningful presents without spending a dime, we celebrated our wedding anniversary like royalty on a $50 budget.
The Steaks
Being full-fledged carnivores at heart, we planned to spend the majority of our budget on steaks. Shopping at a wholesale club was out of the question because it would force us to buy a huge quantity and spend $50 on steaks alone. Instead, we visited a nearby organic store. Because of the slowing economy, quality meat often does not sell and is, eventually, put on sale as it nears its expiration date. We were able to find two organic 12 oz. filet mignons for $25. This left us $25 with which to complete our regal wedding celebration.
The Wine
Though we could find cheap wine at the supermarket, we wanted to toast our 13th anniversary with a wine fit for royalty. We visited a local winery, took a free tour of the facility, then enjoyed a free wine tasting. We selected the Muscat Canelli, a slightly sweet white wine we both found cool and refreshing. The price at the winery was $17 instead of $23 in retail stores, saving us $6. Even so, we now had only $8 remaining in our budget.

The Side Dishes
After visiting a farmer's market on Saturday, we returned with organic potatoes, carrots and mushrooms that cost us $8 instead of an estimated $15 at the supermarket. Though this maxed out our anniversary budget, we were sure to have a feast fit for royalty, so long as we weren't expected to cook it.
Preparations
The day of our anniversary, our son and his girlfriend took charge of preparing the feast. My husband and I spent the morning apart, each preparing a gift. I gathered our four rescue dogs in the room with me and took amusing pictures of them in hats, scarves and reading glasses. Then I created a virtual comic strip and saved it on a CD, which I decorated with an old Christmas gift bow.
The Dinner
We stepped out on the deck at five in the afternoon to find a beautifully set table, with a purple tablecloth, wine glasses sparkling in the sun and purple paper lanterns hanging overhead. Using last year's graduation party decor, our son and his girlfriend had set a table fit for monarchs. The steaks were already cooked to perfection as we sat down to raise a toast, while our chef and decorator slipped quietly away.
Our Gifts
After dinner my husband pulled out my gift. Surprise, surprise. Another CD, though his had no ribbon. We brought out our laptop and shared each other's virtual gifts. He had created a PowerPoint slide show with photographs he had scanned from old photo albums. We drank wine and walked down memory lane together, while the sunset painted a stunning spectacle across the sky.
And so it was that we celebrated our wedding anniversary with a feast fit for royalty and presents we will cherish forever, all on a $50 budget.

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May 21 is Judgment Day: Christian group

May 21 is Judgment Day: Christian group

If the signs are to be believed, the end of the world as we know it starts on May 21.
Billboards are popping up around the globe, including in major Canadian cities, proclaiming May 21 as Judgment Day. "Cry mightily unto GOD for HIS mercy," says one of the mounted signs from Family Radio, a California-based sectarian Christian group that is sending one if its four travelling caravans of believers into Vancouver and Calgary within the next 10 days.
Family Radio's website is blunt in its prediction of Judgment Day and the rolling earthquake that will mark the beginning of the end. "The Bible guarantees it!" the site proclaims, under a passage from the book of Ezekiel, which says "blow the trumpet … warn the people."
Richard Ascough, a professor in the School of Religion at Queen's University in Kingston, Ont., has been watching Family Radio's campaign, and fully expects life as we know it to continue on May 22.
He has seen other apocalyptic predictions come and go, but Family Radio's differs in a notable way: it isn't accompanied by a bold, up-front request for money. And that's worrisome, in his mind.
"I think they really believe it's going to happen," Ascough said in an interview Tuesday.
When groups such as this ask for a lot of money up front, it's possible to think they're "charlatans," Ascough said.

"When they're not doing that so blatantly, it worries me more, because I think they really do believe it and they can convince people who may end up in fact doing things like … quitting their jobs, selling their house, not necessarily to give the money to this group, but simply to divest themselves in light of Judgment Day."
And then that predicted Judgment Day doesn't come.
"We've seen that happen in groups before, and then people are just wiped out, not just emotionally because it didn't happen, but financially," said Ascough. "Some people, it's led to them taking their own lives when they realize what they have done."
Family Radio identifies itself on its website as a "non-profit, non-commercial, Christian radio network" set up in 1958 with one FM station in the San Francisco Bay area. From that station bought by Harold Camping and two others "with the sole intent of proclaiming the Gospel of Jesus Christ," it has grown to a network of 66 stations through the U.S. It also broadcasts its programming internationally.
Some published estimates have put its net worth at $120 million or more.
"To have that kind of revenue base, if that's correct, suggests there must be quite a few listeners," said Ascough.
He said it is "hard to get a read" on the sectarian Christian group.
"Their theology is fundamentalist and yet still generally within the bounds of Christianity, until one gets to this date-setting business."
On its website, Family Radio says May 21 as Judgment Day is "derived solely from evidence found in the Bible."
"Mr. Camping saw God had placed, in scripture, many important signs and proofs. These proofs alert believers that May 21st of 2011 is the date Christ will return for His people and begin a period of the final destruction of the world." All will be over on Oct. 21, "when God will completely destroy this earth and its surviving inhabitants," the website says.
The isn't the first time Camping has predicted the end of the world. He also targeted 1994 as a probable time, but on the website, Family Radio says, "important subsequent Biblical information was not yet known."
Ascough said he thinks Camping's way of reading scripture is "irresponsible."
"It's not the way these Biblical texts were meant to be read, even by their original writers."
And even if they were, scholars can find mistakes in the mathematics and historical assumptions put forward in the Judgment Day predictions, he said. "It's all very slippery."
Ascough hasn't seen such visible activities like billboards from Family Radio in Canada before. He credits technology with allowing the group to reach more broadly into Canada and worldwide.
"They're savvy enough to have figured out how to market themselves well."
Family Radio is hardly the first group to predict the end. Movies, literature and television have told tales of a coming apocalypse, in many forms.
"Once it gets mocked on The Simpsons, you know it's taken hold," said Ascough.
Ascough sees both a cultural fascination with end-of-the-world scenarios and a fascination with the Bible behind the appeal that religious groups such as Family Radio can hold for followers.
"Quite a few people are attracted to fundamentalist groups of all stripes because many people don't like to live with ambiguity."
While Ascough predicts the world will survive any suggestions of its demise on May 21, he fully expects such ideas will be revived from time to time.
"Almost every generation has this kind of group, so I don't think they're going to go away."

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May 21 judgment day

May 21 judgment day

The May 21 Judgment Day meme is the brainchild of an 89-year-old radio evangelist named Harold Camping. Using a mathematical system of his own creation to interpret obscure prophecies in the Bible, Camping originally predicted that Sept. 6, 1994 would be Judgment Day, or the day of the "Rapture" when Christian believers will ascend to heaven, leaving the rest of humanity to its deservedly dreary fate.

But 1994 came and went relatively uneventfully, and Camping has since reworked his equations in such a way that they now point to a May 21, 2011 Rapture. Once the 200 million true Christians (in Camping's estimation) have been whisked away this coming Saturday, he says hell on Earth will ensue and last for 5 months, until Oct. 21, at which point the world will end.

Here's the gist of Camping's calculation: He believes Christ was crucified on April 1, 33 A.D., exactly 722,500 days before May 21, 2011. That number, 722,500, is the square of 5 x 10 x 17. In Camping's numerological system, 5 represents atonement, 10 means completeness, and seventeen means heaven. "Five times 10 times 17 is telling you a story," Camping said on his Oakland-based talk show, Family Radio, last year. "It's the story from the time Christ made payment for your sins until you're completely saved."

He added, "I tell ya, I just about fell off my chair when I realized that."

Over the past few months, Camping's prophecy has gained considerable traction with Christian fundamentalists. Signs, billboards, and volunteer evangelists around the country have helped spread the word.

Christian naysayers point out that, in the gospel of Matthew, Jesus says Judgment Day cannot be foreseen: "Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man comes."

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CDC Recommends Preparing for All Disasters -- Even Zombies

CDC Recommends Preparing for All Disasters -- Even Zombies

Normal natural disasters are floods, tornadoes, hurricanes and earthquakes and being prepared for disaster means being ready for any type of emergency -- including zombies. On Monday, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention blogged about preparing for disaster and reminded readers that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, basic preparedness will help even if there are flesh-eaters roaming.

The CDC recommends that planning ahead for zombies is really no different than preparing for other types of disaster. The same basic principles apply.

Planning ahead for any type of disaster or emergency requires the same basic items: Food (nonperishable of course) and water (one gallon per day per person), medications (both over the counter and prescription medications), tools and supplies (basic stuff like utility knives, duct tape, radio, flashlights, batteries, etc.), sanitation and hygiene (soap, shampoo, bleach, feminine products, towels and lots of toilet paper), clothing and bedding (extra clothes for every family member, blankets), important documents (copies of birth certificates, social security cards, driver's licenses, insurance cards, etc.), first aid supplies.


As with any other emergency, in the event of zombies you should have an emergency plan that includes evacuation plans and a safe place to get away from the zombies.

According to the CDC blog, if a zombie apocalypse breaks out, the CDC will investigate the event just like they would any other disease outbreak. CDC investigation and assistance would include "consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine)." Just like any other disease outbreak, the CDC would try to determine where and how the outbreak started and would make every effort to determine how to best deal with an outbreak of zombies.

Learning the source of the infection would include discovering if a virus or toxin caused the outbreak and if there is any treatment or cure.

The CDC encourages citizens to be prepared for any emergency event--whether it is zombies or the more common hurricanes, tornadoes, floods and earthquakes. Emergency planning for zombies will also suffice in the event of such natural disasters but as always the CDC urges everyone to be ready for whatever might a hazard and disruption of our daily lives.

It is good to know the CDC is willing to take the time to address the concerns of the public rather than scoff at the idea of a zombie apocalypse. Even more so, anyone who is prepared to face zombies is ready to deal with whatever Mother Nature chooses to throw their way, so it's all good.

Tamara L. Morris is certified as a Community Emergency Response Team (CERT) member and is a trained Skywarn Stormspotter through the National Weather Service. She has received interpretive training regarding the New Madrid Seismic Zone through EarthScope -- a program of the National Science Foundation. She researches and writes about earthquakes, volcanoes, tornadoes and other natural phenomena.

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'Like' Button Follows Web Users

'Like' Button Follows Web Users

These widgets are prolific. They have been added to millions of web pages in the past year. Facebook's buttons appear on a third of the world's 1,000 most-visited websites, according to the study. Buttons from Twitter and Google Inc. appear on 20% and 25% of those sites, respectively.
The widgets, which were created to make it easy to share content with friends and to help websites attract visitors, are a potentially powerful way to track Internet users. They could link users' browsing habits to their social-networking profile, which often contains their name.
For example, Facebook or Twitter know when one of their members reads an article about filing for bankruptcy on MSNBC.com or goes to a blog about depression called Fighting the Darkness, even if the user doesn't click the "Like" or "Tweet" buttons on those sites.

For this to work, a person only needs to have logged into Facebook or Twitter once in the past month. The sites will continue to collect browsing data, even if the person closes their browser or turns off their computers, until that person explicitly logs out of their Facebook or Twitter accounts, the study found.
Facebook, Twitter, Google and other widget-makers say they don't use browsing data generated by the widgets to track users; Facebook says it only uses the data for advertising purposes when a user clicks on a widget to share content with friends.

Read more: online.wsj.com/article/

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Google publishes patent for celebrity facial recognition

Google publishes patent for celebrity facial recognition

Google's patent for celebrity facial recognition has been recently published by the USPTO. System works best with A-list.

Just yesterday, Google executive chairman Eric Schmidt was saying that the company wouldn’t be developing a facial recognition database. Now, a patent has been published by the USPTO entitled: “Automatically Mining Person Models of Celebrities for Visual Search Applications”. The timing is bad considering all the negative press about Google lately.
The Google engineers state in the celebrity facial recognition patent that, by feeding a name list and images corresponding to an individuals name, they’ll be able to create an accurate biometric model for the celebrities: “Recognition is then performed based on precision and recall to identify the face images as belonging to a celebrity or indicate that the face is unknown.” Not only would image search return tagged photos but any image on the web with that target celebrity, which would be great for news publishers looking for fresh pictures. Great for paparazzi, maybe not so great for fan club members.
According to the patent, the database has already experimented with a list of 1,000 celebrities (out of a larger set of 30,000) which includes Barack Obama, Britney Spears, Prince Harry of Wales, Brad Pitt, Sarah Palin and her daughter Bristol. As of the time of the experiments, the system had a hard time hunting down clean images of less-notable celebrities such as Bristol Palin who kept popping up with images of her mother.

read more here

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5 Easy Steps to Becoming a Millionaire

5 Easy Steps to Becoming a Millionaire

Who wouldn't want to be worth a million dollars? Many of us dream of achieving this goal, more often than not for the sake of the freedom financial stability would bring. So how can we get there? The answers are actually much easier than you might expect. Here are several easy steps to get you into the millionaires' club. (With a little discipline and the help of some powerful savings vehicles, anyone can hit this mark.)
1. Only Marry Once
According to "The Millionaire Next Door" by Thomas J. Stanley, Ph.D and William D. Danko, Ph.D, the average millionaire is married with three children. The wives of these millionaires are good budgeters and most often described as even more frugal than their husbands. Interestingly, according to Stanley and Danko's survey, half of these wives do no work outside the home and of those who do, they are most likely teachers.
One upside of only marrying once is avoiding the costs of divorce and of subsequent weddings. The cost of a divorce depends on many factors including income, attorney fees, court fees, and the assets a couple has and how they are divided. The average wedding cost in the United States in 2010, according to The Wedding Report.com, was $24,070.

2. Live Off One Income
One of the advantages of having a life partner is the potential to pull in two incomes. If you are able, consider structuring your set expenses based on only one income, and save what comes in from the other income. Doing so strengthens your financial position in two ways: In case of an emergency or if one partner loses their job, you will not only have less set expenses to cover, but you will also have built up your net worth as a safety measure.
3. Choose the Right Career
According to The Millionaire Next Door, "self-employed people make up less than 20% of the workers in America but account for two-thirds of the millionaires." The book goes on to list an average of 45 to 55 hours spent working per week, so by no means is this the self-employed fantasy of playing golf while your business grows.

read more here

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End of the world theories

End of the world theories

End of the world theories

How and when will the world end? Many have wondered this for ages. Below are a few theories and prophecies explaining how it could all go down:

A killer asteroid Asteroid Apophis end of the world

 An asteroid named Apophis, after the Egyptian god of death and destruction, is speeding toward Earth. And there's a chance that, after it swings terrifyingly close to Earth in 2029, it might make a return trip in 2036 that could spell disaster akin to Armageddon for much of the world.

Natural disasters natural disasters end of the world

Would a nuclear meltdown of all 6 reactors at the Fukushima Dai-ichi complex in Japan mean the end of the world as we know it?  Of course not.  But it would be a complete and total nightmare.  Back in 1986, the Chernobyl meltdown spread nuclear radiation all over the northern hemisphere.  According to some estimates, over a million deaths can be attributed to that disaster.  Unfortunately, now we are facing a situation that could develop into the equivalent of "many Chernobyls".  Radiation levels are rising all over northern Japan and millions of Japanese are trying to figure out what to do.

The Mayan Prophecy of 2012

"An Apocalypse (Greek: “lifting of the veil” or “revelation”) is a disclosure of something hidden from the majority of mankind in an era dominated by falsehood and misconception, i.e. the veil to be lifted." — Wikipedia

"Both the Hopis and Mayans recognize that we are approaching the end of a World Age... In both cases, however, the Hopi and Mayan elders do not prophesy that everything will come to an end. Rather, this is a time of transition from one World Age into another. The message they give concerns our making a choice of how we enter the future ahead. Our moving through with either resistance or acceptance will determine whether the transition will happen with cataclysmic changes or gradual peace and tranquility. 

Harold Camping's theory

Harold Camping, 89, is a Christian radio broadcaster and one of the founders of the group Family Radio Worldwide. Camping is most famous for his Judgment Day predictions. His most famous prediction in 1994 was wrong may 21 judgment day, this time he says he has the math to back up his claim harold camping equation may 21. Camping has also predicted the world will end later this year.   

The Biblical Apocalypse
Politicians and political activists frequently declare the end of the world will occur if their candidate isn't elected, or if the debt ceiling isn't raised. Some conservative Christians think the end is on the way because of behavior and practices they judge immoral. Somehow the country, not to mention the planet, survives and when "doomsday" passes, the prognosticators live to predict Armageddon on another day.
Now comes radio preacher Harold Camping, the nearly-90-year-old owner of a network of stations he calls "Family Radio." Camping once belonged to a traditional church. He then decided all churches are corrupt and people should leave whatever congregation they're in and listen only to him because only his interpretation of Scripture is true. I believe that is one characteristic of a cult.
Camping paid for a full-page color ad in USA Today, proclaiming May 21 as the day the world will end.
   
The Buddhist Eschatology
Buddhist eschatology, as subscribed by some Buddhist schools, derives from purported Gautama Buddha's prediction that his teachings would disappear after 5000 years. According to the Sutta Pitaka, the "ten moral courses of conduct" will disappear and people will follow the ten amoral concepts of theft, violence, murder, lying, evil speaking, adultery, abusive and idle talk, covetousness and ill will, wanton greed, and perverted lust resulting in skyrocketing poverty and the end of the worldly laws of true dharma.

During the Middle Ages, the span of time was expanded to 5,000 years. Commentators like Buddhaghosa predicted a step-by-step disappearance of the Buddha's teachings. During the first stage, arahants would no longer appear in the world. Later, the content of the Buddha's true teachings would vanish, and only their form would be preserved. Finally, even the form of the Dharma would be forgotten. During the final stage, the memory of the Buddha himself would be forgotten, and the last of his relics would be gathered together in Bodh Gaya and cremated. Some time following this development a new Buddha named Maitreya will arise to renew the teachings of Buddhism and rediscover the path to Nirvana. Maitreya is believed to currently reside in the Tushita heaven, where he is awaiting his final rebirth in the world.

The Islamic Qiyamah
Except for the theme of monotheism, the Qur'an speaks more of the coming Qiyamah - also known as the Resurrection, the Day of Judgment, Day of Gathering, and the Great Announcement - than of any other topic. "Confessing the Shahadah - "There is no god but God, and Muhammad is the Prophet of God" - and believing in the accountability of all humans before God are the cement which holds Islam together.
Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), among other things, came to warn us of a time when truth would be known, when the thoughts and intentions of the heart would be revealed. He earnestly proclaimed as inevitable a day when accounts would be settled and when scales would be balanced.
Fazlur Rahman, in an oblique paraphrase of sura 50:22, said that Judgment Day is the "Hour when every human will be shaken into a unique and unprecedented self-awareness of his deeds; he will squarely and starkly face his own doings, not-doings, and mis-doings and accept the judgment upon them. . . . "
Something like a Final Judgment or Day of Reckoning is a naturally corollary of monotheism. If there is one God who knows all and sets standards of behavior for the world, there must be a time of judgment, or the edifice crumbles of its own weight."
This major theme and promise is upheld not only in the Qur'an, but also in other religious scriptures. Though opinions may differ on precise details it is generally believed that it is connected to a time of momentous upheaval, calamity and the end of Earth.
Hundreds of interpreters have written commentaries on it during the 14 centuries of its existence, and none have claimed to understand all of its various aspects and meanings. This website is an attempt to examine in detail what different verses in the Qur'an tell us about Qiyamah and to reconcile what might appear as differing, even contradictory descriptions of the event. It contains hundreds of intellectually challenging and severely critical pages vigorously demanding answers pertaining to and upholding this central theme of Islam. The result of a five-year research, this study compels Muslims not to allow themselves to pick and choose verses that suit their doomsday notion of Al-Qiyamah. Rather we must take the Qur'an in its entirety and examine those resurrection-related surahs and Sure Signs that have challenged our scholars over the centuries. As a result of their admitted shortcomings and apparent incomprehension, the scattered verses relating to Al-Qiyamah have been disfigured beyond recognition by mistranslations that reflect the views of the ulema. (It must be strongly emphasized that this website exclusively deals with resurrection-related surahs and nothing else. Thus the ulema is openly challenged to respond and deny the Great News that the Ummah, and the rest of humankind, are called upon to participate in and bear witness to the Resurrection Day and the self-reproaching Spirit. Till date no Muslim scholar has risen to the challenge.)


Nostradamus' prediction nostradamus year 3797
I have been studying Nostradamus for years and I recently made a new code discovery of one of his more famous prophecies. About the world ending in the year 3797 according to most interpretations.

However, I recently figured out that the year 3797 in the prophecy is actually the year of 2209 AD. All of his prophecies are encoded and when he gives a time it is always an astronomical and/or astrological time code. The year 3797 is a CLEAR reference to a mathematical time point on an astronomical/astrological basis.

The year 3797 refers to 3,797 years since the last significant alignment point in the ancient's calendar of time (one example of a calendar that is based on this is the Mayan calendar). Many of Nostradamus' prophecies are also encoded directly matching into verses from the Bible and even into actual Bible codes as well.

The year 3,797 is also a direct reference to the events of the Biblical Exodus events and the mega disaster on the Greek island of Santorini. In short, the year 3,797 is in fact the year 2209 AD.

If you want to go out with a bang or a whimper, you can throw a party or lounge around and watch movies about the end of the world. 

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The Right, Eco-Friendly Way to Wash Your Car

How to keep your car clean and looking good without hurting the environment or the vehicle's paint job.
Preserving the environment is a major concern these days, especially when it comes to automobiles. This even applies to something as seemingly mundane as preserving your vehicle's appearance. How and where you wash your car does make a difference. The matter is never more critical than in spring, when most proud car owners are busy washing off the effects of winter's unrelenting assault before it takes a toll on their pride and joy's looks, integrity and mechanical well-being.
Making a habit of keeping your vehicle as clean as possible, inside and out, will reap great benefits. A sparkling-clean car will not only flatter the eye and the owner's ego, it will also help the vehicle last longer and stay in better shape, thus improving resale value.

The question here is: What is the best and most eco-friendly way to achieve and sustain vehicular cleanliness?

Routine Cleaning

Dirt, road salt, tar and various other forms of gunk, goo and residue are your car's worst enemies. Keeping them off your vehicle's bodywork, year-round, is the basic challenge. Hand-washing a car remains the best and most effective way to do this, but it must be done the right way, and even then it is not the most environmentally friendly way to go.
These days the "greenest" way to wash your car is to run it through an automatic car wash. Studies show that a session in the car wash uses roughly half the water the average owner would use while washing it at home with the traditional bucket and hose. Commercial car-wash systems are also required, by law, to contain and collect the water used during the wash. So are professional detailers. The waste water is then cleaned and, in most cases, used again.
Automatic car-wash systems even get the nod from car-care professionals, especially when it comes to routine cleanings. David Lee, owner and operator of L.A. Detail, based in Toronto, offers thorough detailing services, but he freely admits to using commercial car-wash systems for his personal vehicle and says he finds them both useful and practical.

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How to Criticize Your Boss

How to Criticize Your Boss

Q: How can you tell your senior manager that they use a catch phrase too much in conversation? Phrases like "well obviously," "you know," and, my personal favorite, "to be honest" can cause them to disengage with their audience and diminish their effectiveness as speakers.


A: Your concerns are well justified, but you'll want to put a lot of thought into how you approach your manager on this topic. Just as important as what you say to him or her is how you say it. Depending on the relationship you have with your boss as well as the tone you use, it could work to bring you closer or end up causing a rift, say experts.

"Any time you are offering unsolicited advice, you run the risk of alienating versus helping," explains Jodie Charlop, founder of Atlanta-based career coaching firm Potential Matters. "It adds to the complexity if there is a power differential."



Timing also matters, says Tracey Trottenberg, a Los Angeles-based leadership trainer, coach, and speaker. "Catch them in a moment when they're more receptive and not racing around or short on time," she recommends. Still, the conversation doesn't have to be long or drawn out, she says. "It can be delivered simply and to the point."

In addition to your tone and timing, you'll also want to consider your motivation. "If you are coming from a place of truly wanting to help [your] manager, then you'll have a higher probability of finding the right words and approach," says Ms. Charlop. But if you're bringing this up with your manager because the habit is driving you nuts, don't let your emotions push you to be too blunt.
It is quite common for people to feel like they need to correct or "fix" others, she says. Often, people justify their actions with the idea that they are helping the person in question. "But the fact is we are judging by our own personal standards," says Ms. Charlop.

When you're ready to bring it up, find a safe setting and ask permission to talk about something that you've observed in your informal conversations. "Share how it is impacting you," says Ms. Charlop. For example, you could say something along the lines of: "Bob, I value your expertise. I've observed in our conversations that you use the catch phrase 'you know' many times in our conversation -- so much, I find it hinders my ability to really hear you." Then, follow it up with a positive. "It's important to me that we have great communication."
Rather than singling out your manager, try to make him or her a part of a larger class or group, suggests crisis management expert Davia Temin.

Years ago, when Ms. Temin worked as a marketing director for a major investment bank, she was asked by the bank's president to help fix some of the senior managers' poor table manners. Rather than approach the managers directly, Ms. Temin says she hired two men to coach them as a group on communication skills. By Ms. Temin's design, the first meeting was held over breakfast in the corporate dining room and the bankers were handed copies of "Tiffany's Table Manners for Teenagers." Then, the consultants talked about the importance of table manners, she recalls. "I orchestrated it all, and the message got through."

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What Not to Buy at Ikea

What Not to Buy at Ikea Five things you shouldn't buy at Ikea

Ikea offers sleek, modern design at such reasonable prices it’s no wonder that the average customer in the United States drives 50 miles round trip to shop the inspiration rooms (and inevitably dine at the equally impressive smorgasbord of cafeteria food). While we’re huge fans of the Scandinavian design behemoth's trendy home accents, chic wall art, graphic rugs, and highly functional accent furniture, there are certain things not worth the trip. Here are five items you’d be wise to re-think:


1.    Mattresses
When it comes to mattresses, the saying you get what you pay for rings true. And because getting consistent good nights’ sleeps is crucial for your health, opting for a quality mattress is a wise investment. Ikea offers mattresses at a price range from $80 for a simple, twin-sized spring mattress to $649 for a king-size foam mattress. While the latter promises pressure-relieving and temperature-stabilizing technology at a seemingly reasonable price, the price structure is a bit misleading. To walk away from Ikea with a complete bed set, you’d have to purchase three more items:  A bed base, foundation, and at least one mattress pad, adding almost $500 more to your total cost. What seems like a good deal on the surface, actually turns out to be what you’d be spend  for a full set at any other mattress retailer, such as Mancini’s Sleep World or Sleep Train. Furthermore, you don’t get the free delivery and set-up or the ability to negotiate payment plans like you would at most mattress-specific retailers, which are constantly offering promotions and deals in an effort to stay competitive.



2.    Imitation Wood Products You’ll Use Every Day
Ikea is full of products that look like wood but are actually made of laminate or pressed wood—or wood particles glued together. These pieces are generally of lower quality and won’t last as long as the real thing. While purchasing accent furniture or bookshelves in this material might serve you well, you might find yourself replacing that laminate coffee or dining table within a year as the daily use will cause the laminate to peal away at the edges or become stained or scratched.

3.    Dinnerware
If you’re looking for a simple, no-frills dinner set, Ikea's $25 set of six plates, side plates, and bowls, might fit your needs. But you’d be able to find a similar set at Target or other retailers for the same price. And if you’d like your flatware to make a bit more of a statement, Ikea’s selection is lacking. While the Scandinavian purveyor offers more than enough ways to add flair to your pad at a reasonable price, their specialty is not stylish flatware. We recommend filling your Ikea cart with tabletop accents or fabulous wall decals, but scooping up china flatware when department stores like Macy’s offer sales because you’ll have much more inventory to choose from.

4.    Quality Cutlery
Any professional chef or avid home cook will tell you that a quality set of knives is essential. And unfortunately, quality requires investment. There’s no way the $10 set Ikea offers will provide the ease, precision, longevity, or efficiency that a professional knife set promises.
 
5.    Things with Complicated Assembly Instructions
Unless you’re a natural handyman (or know someone who is) or simply must have that bookshelf that comes in a gazillion pieces, be wary of some of the items that require a huge amount of DIY assembly.  Purchasing a fully-formed bookshelf elsewhere for a bit more might be worth what you save in time and sanity.

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Unusual phobias

Unusual phobias

To fear is to be human, but for some people, having a phobia can be a debilitating fact of life.
Some phobias can be quite common, such as claustrophia, or fear of enclosed spaces, aracnophobia, or fear of spiders, aviophobia, or fear of flying, and acrophia, or fear of heights.
These phobias can be easily understood by those not affected, perhaps because they trigger some discomfort in most people.
But for those truly affected, they can trigger serious emotional and physical responses, including panic attacks.
We have compiled a list of real, but unusual phobias, keeping in mind that those affected experience real distress from their condition.

Coulrophobia is the fear clowns, and not necessarily restricted to evil ones. Though this is a recent creation, a study at the University of Sheffield found that children in hospitals were frightened by clown themed decor.
Disposophobia is the fear of losing or disposing of things, and may be related to obsessive compulsive disorder. Those affected tend to assign great value to things of objectively limited value. It results in living spaces so cluttered as to be unliveable, and tends to result in unsanitary conditions.
Osmophobia, also known as olfactophobia, is the fear of smells, where odours, particularly foul ones, can trigger migranes. Some of those affected can treat the condition by being exposed to pleasant odours.
Triskaidekaphobia is fear of the number 13, which in some cultures is an unlucky or evil number. Its origins are unclear, but it is still widely feared, with highrise building in some countries skipping the floor altogether in their elevator numbering.
Anthophobia is strong fear of flowers. While those affected understand that they pose no threat, the sight or thought of flowers causes them anxiety.
Gymnophobia is a fear of nudity, even though it is understood to be harmless. It is related, rather, to a general fear of sexuality, a fear of being physically inferior, or that being naked leaves them exposed and unprotected.
Aside from these real phobias, that can be very trying for those affected, we've found a few that are amusing and, fortunately, entirely fictitious:
Anatidaephobia is the fear that a duck is watching you, and was coined by author Gary Larson for his cartoon series The Far Side.
Luposlipaphobia, also coined by Gary Larson, is the fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor.
Arachibutyrophobia is the fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth. It was devised by Charles M. Schulz for his Peanuts comics. It does happen...
Venustraphobia is fear of beautiful women, devised in a satirical article by BBC News. The definition: "Ever shudder with revulsion when Miss World happened to be on the TV or get a nauseous feeling while watching catwalk models strut their stuff? Well it could be down to a fear of beautiful women."
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia is the fear of long words, combining the words hippopotamus, monstro, sesquipedali (meaning a long word), and phobia. It does not appear in any reputable dictionary.

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EastEnders keeps Best Soap crown

EastEnders keeps Best Soap crown

EastEnders has retained its crown as best of British at the soap world's Oscars.
The BBC One series, which recently caused controversy with its baby-swap storyline, beat stiff competition to win the Best Soap award for the fourth year in a row at the British Soap Awards.
Despite missing out on the top prize, Coronation Street won nine awards, compared with EastEnders' total of four.
The dramatic live show that saw a tram crash on to the Weatherfield cobbles, filmed to mark the ITV soap's 50th anniversary, won awards for Best Single Episode and Spectacular Scene of the Year. It also led to the plot that won Coronation Street this year's Best Storyline - End of the line for the Websters and the Dobbs.
Best Dramatic Performance was won by Jane Danson for her role as Leanne Barlow. Her screen stepson Simon, played by Alexander Bain, won the Best Young Performance award at the ceremony, which took place at Manchester's Granada Studios.

Bill Tarmey, who bowed out of the soap after playing Jack Duckworth for 31 years, won the Lifetime Achievement Award and Best Exit gong.
Patti Clare, who plays eccentric Mary Taylor in Coronation Street, won the prize for Best Comedy Performance.
Michelle Keegan, Tina McIntyre in the soap, won the viewer-voted prize for Sexiest Female, for the third year running. It was also third time lucky for EastEnders' Scott Maslen, who was named Sexiest Male again.
EastEnders picked up Best On-screen Partnership for Jessie Wallace and Shane Richie's portrayal of Kat and Alfie Moon. Jessie was also named Best Actress.
Hollyoaks actor Emmett J Scanlan was voted both Best Newcomer and Villain of the Year for his role as Brendan Brady. Emmerdale actor Danny Miller (Aaron Livesy) was named Best Actor.

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The worst things women say to men

The worst things women say to men

The awful thing about early-date nerves is that it can turn your brain into mush. Worse yet, the more you like your date, the more eager you are to come across cool, calm and collected and the more likely it seems to be that you’ll slip up at some point in the old chit-chat stakes.
In any ordinary circumstance it is easy enough to access the rules of social etiquette that help you get by, but cut to the nerve-ridden date scene and faux pas are a-flowing.
Whether you’ve been on the receiving end of ill-advised banter, or you’re guilty of blurting out the Freudian slips yourself, here’s the worst of what real-life daters have dished out and got back.


“I had to give up ballet dancing because my boobs were too big.”

“I like you. You remind me of my dad.”

“I know that every man I meet wants to sleep with me.”

“I cheated on my ex, it wasn’t really working anyway.”

“I’d love to take you shopping. Project!”

“Have you ever considered shaving off your beard?”

“I used to be a model. When I was 12.”

“Men always talk to my breasts.”

“Absolutely nothing gets in the way of Corrie. Ever.”

“I don’t have any male friends. They always end up falling in love with me.”

“I don’t have any female friends. They always end up jealous of me.”

“So your brother is the brainy one of the family by the sounds of it?”

“Are you wearing mascara?”

“I haven’t really got time to waste on frivolous dating – the old body clock’s ticking away.”

“I’m a very emotionally open person and men often feel challenged by that.”
“Looks used to be really important to me, but I’m trying to force myself to be less picky. This date marks the beginning of the new me!”

“I think your dad was flirting with me.”

“Dinner? Can we just make it drinks? I don’t really like eating in front of people.”

“Funny, I had you down as a good dancer!”

“Haven’t had my moustache done in ages, but you can’t tell can you?”

“My dad says The Queen’s Head is better for a more cosy and intimate evening, let’s go there”

“Do you mind if we sit near the loo?”

“So...am I as fit as you remember?”

“Men always think I’m flirting with them when I’m honestly not – it gets me into real trouble.”

“I’d honestly rather you didn’t comment on my appearance if you don’t mind. I’m always suspicious of a man who pays me a compliment.”

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Don’t Steal Computer From People Who Know How To Use Computers – Part Deux

Don’t Steal Computer From People Who Know How To Use Computers – Part Deux

Back in March we brought you the story of Mark Bao, the serial entrepreneur who tracked his laptop thief and released humiliating videos of the culprit doing the rubber band dance on Youtube.
Last night a live drama played out on Twitter, as Sean Power, a tech author and consultant, used the free software program, Prey, to track his stolen laptop, which had disappeared,  along with a birth certificate, health card, cell phone and cash, from a New York City bar while he was in town on business

Despite checking every bar he'd been at, he couldn't find the laptop bag. They all insisted nobody had seen it, he says.
From back home in Canada, Power remembered he had the software, and two days later says he watched remotely as the "thief" took a photo and uploaded it to Flickr.
That helped Power figure out his name and location: Oficina Latina, on Prince St., in Nolita. It was one of the bars he'd visited.
Twitter followers watching Powers tweet about the drama soon figured out the culprit was actually a part-owner in the establishment.

Power says he tried to sic the NYPD on the owner, who identified himself to the press as Paolo Voltano, but he says they refused to respond without his filing an official report — which he couldn't do from Ontario. Several online watchers offered to help, but Power begged them not to.
"Please please please don't get directly involved. I don't want any of you to get hurt for a stupid laptop."

Reached for comment, Voltano insists the misplacement was a communication error among the bar staff. "When he called we didn't know the bag had a laptop in it," he said. "It wasn't a laptop bag, it was a big bag, like one you have a lot of stuff inside."
"It was a mis-communication. We didn't know we had it, and until someone comes to claim it, we don't know."
He began using the computer for personal purposes, he said, only after the bag had been there "a week and nobody claimed it. I thought it was karma," he said, mentioning his own computer and cell phone had been stolen three weeks before at the restaurant.
In the meantime, a Twitter follower was staking out the bar, and the story had broken on several blogs, although Voltano was still blissfully unaware.

 read more here

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First Person: Living a Six-Figure Lifestyle on a $30,000 Salary

First Person: Living a Six-Figure Lifestyle on a $30,000 Salary

Like millions of Americans out there, I like the nicer things in life. I have an affinity for high-end cars, designer clothing, and name-brand home furnishings.
There was a time when I had the six-figure income to afford these things. That was before the crash of what has now become known as the dot-com era. After losing many nice things, I learned that even living at one's means can be a risky proposition. So the challenge became how to continue to live that lifestyle while spending drastically less than I did before.
I wanted to figure out how I could afford these things at a $30,000-a-year salary, just in case I ever had another salary decrease. That planning all paid off when the great recession came. Here's how I learned to have a six-figure lifestyle with a $30,000 yearly budget.

How to Get the Big Home
This one was all about patience, hard work, and discipline. First: New homes are out of the question. They're generally overpriced. I almost bid on a couple of for-sale-by-owner homes, but just couldn't get the right combination of price and neighborhood. I focused on HUD homes and foreclosures, and learned quickly that banks don't want homes on their books. I found a HUD home in a neighborhood with prices averaging above $200,000. My home was more than 60% less than that. It required a bit of work -- I spent a lot of free time on it as a do-it-yourself project -- but in the end I had my nice home. No one knows that I paid less than $80,000 and that I have a monthly mortgage payment of less than $500.
Getting the Car to Match the Lifestyle
I'm a sport and luxury car enthusiast. First I wanted a Mustang, and this was the easiest deal of them all to find. I didn't go to dealers for this one. I went to Craigslist and the classified ads. I know many people will say that this is immoral, but I found a desperate seller who was willing to almost give the car to me because his notes were too high. I was happy, and he was happy to be rid of it. A simple refinancing and I had a car note for less than $150 per month. Not long after that I decided that I wanted a Lexus, and I did go through a dealer to get that one. I got a great deal on a used Lexus (I no longer buy new cars). Here's how I saved about $5,000 on that deal.
I Love Movado Watches
Anyone who knows me knows that I love Movado watches and will rarely, if ever, wear anything else. At a $30,000-a-year salary, I certainly can't afford to shell out $1,000 or $2,000 on a watch. So I had to find a new source. I began scouring Craigslist, eBay, and pawn shops for good deals on watches. I found three Movado watches that were used and paid less than $500 total for all three of them. I recently sold one of these watches on eBay for $600. I now wear watches valued at more than $800 each, and I basically paid nothing for them.

read more here

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