Sunday, November 6, 2011

100 Iron Men of the Rules

100 Iron Men of the Rules

1) When you walk into a restaurant of national cuisine, choose the one to go to the representatives of this nationality.

2) If the airport miss a connection, search for Fast Track - a separate line for being late to transplant - or lomis in the queue for business class.

3) If a friend or loved one calls you from the police asking for help, you must do everything in your power.

4) You have the right to hit another man with his foot in the groin just in case of threat to life or health.

5) You have the right to answer "I do not know" to any question about your friend, and given his wife or girlfriend



6) DO NOT PROMISED TO A CHILD THAT CAN NOT PERFORM.

7) Always screw cap on the bottle, after nalesh (popesh).

8) You must borrow another machine, screwdriver or any other thing, if he asked you about this no later than 12 hours.

9) You do not have to be nice and friendly with their husbands or boyfriend your girlfriends girls.

10) If the queue is in a single window or door, always look for a number of second or machine with the same functions. And not only found him to join the crowd.

11) On the road, always missed at least a forward driving trucks. Of all the men at the wheel they are least likely to want to harm you, and are most at risk in case of delay.

12) Pizza to eat with your hands, taking a piece of bread crust. Fold piece in half and oil fields, if the waiter forgot to serve.

13) If your weak or too drunk to provoke another fight, you are obliged to act on his side. But if he did run up - no obligation.

14) Do not argue with salespeople, waiters and other staff. In case of conflict immediately call the chief of them.

15) Not a man to promise to marry or to say that you love to drag a woman into bed.

16) Do not take the company's mistress, if friends come with their wives. And vice versa.

17) Do not try to row the boat flexing his hands. Rowing - is a series of slopes with a straight back and straight arms.

18) Car rule of three "e" Give way to fool.

19) If you attacked a shark, hit the bloody stump of her hand right on the nose!

20) You must stop a drunk friend, who tries to tell you someone else's secret.

21) You have no right to claim from the woman that she spoke about her ex.

22) girl friend - not a girl!

23) If the link is broken, always calls back to the one who originally called.

24) If you broke a borrowed thing, you must fix it or buy a new one.

25) Do not cool to not go to the polls: your unused ballot box stuffing will.

26) Always call back a friend, if he could not answer.

27) If you can once again not to eat salt - no salt.

28) You must recognize the thing to throw out trash and if a) you can not use it right now b) not used it at least a year, or c) you have one more thing with the same functions.

29) Firing of anything was rested in that be arms and lowered his sights a little lower than it seems the rules.

30) Cigarettes not stir petrol lighters. Cigarettes can not be put out, jabbing them in the bottom of the ashtray. Simply put the butt and let him go out.

31) The taxi always sit in the back seat.

32) When the push-ups, always tucked shirt in shorts, otherwise you will not see her belly.

33) Always ask for any-more money than it's worth it.

34) Do not betray his wife within a hundred miles from home.

35) If you get lost, meet there, where they saw each other last time.

36) never discussed the amount of the bill in a restaurant with those whom you entertained.

37) No man is obliged to shake hands with another in a lavatory or exit.

38) When eating at a Japanese restaurant, has never stirred the wasabi - let him disappear. Sushi luggage into the sauce sideways.

39) Never get involved in the conflict couples.

40) Do not stand in the left lane with a twisted left wheels.

41) Even unloaded weapons can not be sent to the person.

42) If you wear a suit has managed, the belt and shoes should be monophonic.

43) Even awkward to say, but - a run rip off the sleeve of his jacket.

44) DO NOT THIN Single malt whiskey cola.

45) Do not joke with the authorities when you ask formal questions such as "You're carrying a bomb?".

46) You've got to clean up or at least rinse your hair brush before brushing just washed hair.

47) Do not wear a fake.

48) The restaurant always take extreme pair of devices for each subsequent meal.

49) If in the first 15 minutes at the poker table you can not understand who is the sucker, then it's you.

50) It is unworthy to drink beer from bottles, cans or plastic, if at hand is a glass.

51) You have no right to ask a friend to help you with any nonsense (to fix a computer, to carry things), if one earns more per hour than the corresponding professional.

52) There are no circumstances in which a man can drink hard liquor. If "no go", mix a cocktail. Whiskey-Cola - this is not the same as that drink whiskey cola.

53) rude grumble about the quality, variety, or zaboristosti what you treat.

54) counts the money, even if you take them with friends.

55) Do not ask another "And when you get married?" in the presence of his girlfriend.

56) If you attack a dog, pretend that you raise the stone from the ground.

57) Before the shave is better to take a hot shower to steam out the skin.

58) Do not take off your clothes before your partner during sex.

59) On the stairs, a man must go below the woman.

60) Always book room at the hotel through the Internet, even if you are already standing in the lobby.

61) After the booze always Drink before going to sleep a little more plain water.

62) last cigarette from another Bundle can not be taken.

63) There are situations in which two men can not simultaneously be under the same umbrella.

64) Before calling the question "So where are you?" Every man has to give late five minutes beyond the scheduled date.

65) Three situations in which a woman does not have to skip ahead: 1) elevator, 2) rear seat of the car, and 3) an unfamiliar place.

66) Men do not go together to buy clothes for themselves.

67) Do not talk on a cell in a public transport than a minute.

68) At the confluence of two roads, always observe the sequence: you missed, you missed.

69) separate fighting dogs, taking their hind legs and lifted off the ground.

70) Even if all the other topics have been exhausted, never ask another man who he is on a horoscope.

71) The winner must give at least one opportunity to win.

72) NEVER buttoning the bottom button on his jacket.

73) Do not impose on your phone with a girl acquaintance.

74) Traveling through Russia, refuel, when you have left polbaka.

75) not to drop into a dead zone for heavy vehicles. It is right at the cabin.

76) Always ask permission from the person before you put it in a photo Network, especially if they make the final stages of corporate parties.

77) finished with a meal, always put the knife and fork parallel.

78) Always write or call back after the first woman to sex the next day.

79) Buckle.

80) Modify the wife with her girlfriend - zapadlo.

81) Divide by zero - you can not.

82) rude comment on the actions of man, which raises or drag of gravity, unless you are carrying this grand marble together.

83) Always turn off your mobile in a cinema. Zadolbali already! Said a hundred times!

84) There is only one way to pour beer man - on the wall, bending the glass.

85) When buying flowers, always take those with a longer stem. This means that they are young and they've never cut.

86) Faced with a polite attitude on the road, be sure to say thank emergency lights.

87) HEAD RULE: Praise in public, cursed in private.

88) during arm wrestling, always set your right foot forward.

89) In a strange city go to that restaurant, where most people.

90) Do not stand in the queue, if your time is not worth it. To do this, once and for all to calculate how much you earn per hour, and can relate this amount to wasted time.

91) When doing a census of the text into your blog, always try to find and identify the source.

92) argue, especially with a woman, try to use instead of "you-messages" "I-messages": instead of "You zadolbali" always say "I feel zadolbali", etc.

93) To take the bright light beer food (pasta, fish, cheese), to the dark - dark (roasted meat).

94) The only person who has the right to watch porn with you - this is a woman with whom you sleep.

95) Paying mortgage, car or hotel for, as well as online shopping, use the no debit card and credit.

96) Do not let the loved one in debt more than willing to give him.

97) Prior to the responsible medical procedure ask her opinion about the need to have at least three experts.

98) If you put a woman in an unfamiliar car, remember the number, or at least pretend.

99) do not comment on the character or appearance of the girl, which your friend was foolish enough to start a serious relationship.

100) GOLDEN RULE ETHICS: Do unto others as you want others to do unto you.

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